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Writer's pictureKate Mihevc Edwards PT, DPT

The Illusion of ‘Work-Life’ Balance

This is a guest post by Dr. Shawn Haywood



The notion and desire of work-life balance is an interesting one, and a bit misleading as well.  What people actually mean when they report needing, ‘more work-life balance’, is really, that they work too damn much!  And are usually far too busy outside of work as well.

Truly, what has happened to backyard BBQs, leisurely picnics, lazing about reading in a hammock, or simply sitting still for 15 minutes doing, the most dastardly thing of all, nothing!!

Americans have lost their marbles with our complete addiction to being busy.  This newest form of addiction (busyness) is certainly not evolving without consequences.


For one, it promotes other addictions.  Eating (shoveling low nutrition, and high fat, sugar or grain foods down our gullets, often without even bothering to chew!), alcohol (to calm us down and cope with a frantic existence!), shopping (to escape and feel valuable, albeit briefly), and the often inevitable sleep, pain, and anxiety medications (to numb difficult or overwhelming feelings, and a hope to get some much needed rest). 


This isn’t to say that medications are all bad, although most of my clients are able to joyfully say good-bye to most medications in a matter of just a few months. But what about the alcohol and food issues?  Well, of course this is ravaging bodies and brains at an alarming rate!  Check out this blog for more information on how a frantic lifestyle specifically affects your brain, body, emotions and spirit: Your Life... A Run-A-Way Freight Train? Or A Gentle Zen Garden?


Here’s what people ACTUALLY mean when they talk about a desire for ‘work-life balance’.

Meaning.  Significance.  Slow down.


Meaning

When our life is rooted in deep meaning, life feels joyful and balanced.  In order to be our best, most amaz-balls self, we need meaningful work, connections, hobbies (creativity), and play!

What does your level of meaning look like in each of these areas.  Rate yourself from 1-10.  One equating to zero meaning, and 10 equally more meaning and fulfillment than you could possibly imagine!

  • Career  __________

  • Relationships with partner, friends, co-workers __________ 

  • Hobbies (creativity) __________

  • Play __________

Where could you use a boost in adding more of a sense of meaning in your life?  How will you achieve that over the next 30 days?


Significance

Significance is all about gorgeous feeling.  Feeling useful, productive and as if you are making a lovely impact on, and contribution to, the world!


In order to perceive life as completely fan-tasical, significance must flourish within our relationships, career, hobbies, and play.


What does your level of significance look like in each of these areas.  Rate yourself from 1-10.  One equating to zero meaning, and 10 equally more meaning and fulfillment than you could possibly imagine!

  • Career  __________

  • Relationships with partner, friends, co-workers __________ 

  • Hobbies (creativity) __________

  • Play __________

Where could you use a boost in adding more of a sense of significance in your life?  How will you achieve that over the next 30 days?


S-l-o-w Down


Slowing down is essential in our ability to ENJOY life.  Often our busyness is an attempt to escape and usually includes super duper busy brain (ie, way too much thinking, analyzing, toiling).  Just like any addiction, busyness stops us from feeling what is in our hearts and desperate to come forth. It keeps us on a high of sorts, although we freely talk about what a pain in the ass busyness is, how stressed we are, and our desire for more, you guessed it, ‘work-life balance’! 


Yet we all have a choice.  We can say NO, eliminate obligations, tell a boss that ‘one more project’ will NOT fit into this month’s schedule, and so on.


YOU are at choice.  It might take a month or two to delete commitments and obligations.  But if you want to live more fully, freely and happily, slowing down is imperative!


In order to embrace life as completely rockin’, slowing down is a must and will bare great fruit within your relationships, career, hobbies, and play.


What does your level of slowing down look like in each of these areas currently.  Rate yourself from 1-10.  One equating to zero meaning, and 10 equally more meaning and fulfillment than you could possibly imagine!

  • Career  __________

  • Relationships with partner, friends, co-workers __________ 

  • Hobbies (creativity) __________

  • Play __________

Where could you shift your life, say no and build in more down time?  How will you achieve that over the next 30 days?


Thanks for tuning in!


In Love and Liberation!


Shawn

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